On Permission Slips, Asking for Help, and Burnout

Hello, friend – 

As I write this on Friday the 13th – a scary-seeming day – I want to share something terrifying I did recently. 

I asked for help. 

Asking for help is one of the hardest things for me to do, second only to staying up past midnight or playing any kind of sport. Anyway, I’m guessing that as a high achiever with occasional perfectionist tendencies, you might have similar trouble seeking outside guidance.

For context, I’ve been in business as a health & wellness coach for about six months now, and I’d been lying if I said things were going swimmingly recently.

I’m ashamed to admit that I’ve been largely silent on Instagram, not really knowing who I’m talking to or what to say, questioning everything. Turns out silencing yourself isn’t the key to business success. 🫠

Realizing I needed to make a change unless I wanted to keep spiraling in inaction, I worked up the courage to ask for help from a business coach, who audited how Amplify shows up online. And you know what?

The coach's advice was not scary!

It was direct, kind, and actionable – exactly what I strive to offer my own clients (go figure). 

One particular thing the coach said after reviewing my website and Instagram has really stayed with me: 

“You know what the issues are – maybe I'm adding a little color and some tactics, but you already know what needs to be fixed. Now you just need to take action. Here is your permission slip.”

I had to laugh a little when she said that. Many of my clients have used similar language, knowing that something needs to change, sometimes even knowing the exact habit that needs to be modified, but embarking on that change only after being given my “permission” to do so.  

…which is wild! It's not literal permission, of course – we are all human beings with agency – but hearing from a coach, an outsider, that they are allowed to throw out old habits is somehow transformational. Even if it's hard. Even if it pisses someone off. Even if they fail. Even if they succeed.

With my own metaphorical permission slip in hand, I’ve made a big change to how I show up online and talk about my business. 

Instead of talking to some nebulous person seeking ~wellness~ in the general sense (hint: that person does not exist), I’m tailoring my coaching to those experiencing burnout. 

Why? Because unlike nutrition and fitness, where I have a lot of experience and knowledge, but less of a unique perspective, I have firsthand experience facing burnout and clawing my way back. I’ve also witnessed how many well-intentioned professionals are so ill-equipped when it comes to helping others recover from burnout and build resilience in an actionable way. 

Am I offering a magic solution? Of course not. 

Am I offering an evidence-backed, slow-and-steady way to help you take care of yourself, make small changes with big impact, and get back to feeling like you again? 

Yes. Yes I am. 

Unlike the vague offer of “healthier, richer, lives” 🤔 I was promoting before, burnout recovery is an overlooked, underserved area of health and wellness coaching, it’s something I feel passionate about, and something I can speak of with confidence.

So just as a business coach gave me a permission slip to make big changes, I’m giving you a permission slip to make changes in your life and stop feeling like shit. 

Ready to regain your energy, rebuild your confidence, and feel like yourself again? 

How to Create a Wellness Routine That Works for You

Many clients seek coaching to create a new wellness routine, a collection of healthy habits involving eating, movement, sleep or some combination of the above. After setbacks or previous attempts that haven’t stood up to life’s unexpected twists and turns, they’re ready to finally find something that works.

Sound familiar? While every person is unique, here are some universal strategies I use with clients as foundations for wellness routines that last.

Define what you want: routine, rhythm, or ritual?

First, let’s lay out some definitions.

routine (n.): a sequence of actions regularly followed; a fixed program
rhythm (n.): a strong, regular, repeated pattern of movement or sound
ritual (n.): the established form for a ceremony; a ceremonial act or action

You probably didn’t come here to nitpick word choice, but hear me out: the biggest favor you can do for yourself in this process is to determine up front what you actually want.

Maybe you want a routine, something consistent and rigid; for example, I will go to bed at 11 p.m. and wake up at 6:30 a.m. every day.

Maybe you want a rhythm with regular patterns and some variation, e.g., I will go to bed by 11 p.m. Sunday-Thursday and by 2 a.m. Friday-Saturday.

Or perhaps you prefer to establish a ritual with deeper meaning, like I will listen to my body and give myself rest whenever I need it.

Whatever you choose to create, name it. You know what works best in your unique life.

Discover your why

What makes having a new routine, rhythm, or ritual important to you?
How would your life be different with this foundation in place?
How would it serve you in the short and long term?

The answers to these questions will serve as an anchor when challenges inevitably arise. Find an object or a phrase that embodies your why, and keep it in close proximity. This could be a photo that you pin as a widget on your phone’s home screen, a small souvenir or token you keep on your desk or bedside table, or a motivational quote or mantra that you display on a post-it note in your living space.

Tap into your inner strengths

What are you really, really good at?
How would your loved ones describe the best parts of you?
Who are you when you’re at your best?
What makes you you?

Make note of these strengths, as they’ll be part of your foundation for change – a signature of the Amplify approach. Here are a few examples of how recent clients’ strengths influenced their behavior changes.

• A client who thrives on community organizing created a movement routine (more like a ritual!) that involves walking with others.

• A client with a love of learning wanted to eat more vegetables. They fully embraced their curiosity by buying new veggies and challenging themselves to try new recipes each week.

• A client who is artistic and highly visual created a simple coloring sheet to help them track their exercise progress — something that doubled as a relaxation and grounding activity.

Gather your tools — and use them with intention

For any change you seek in your wellness routine, rhythm, or ritual, it’s likely you’ll need some tools. The good news is that these don’t have to be expensive. Maybe you just need an app to help you meditate, or a water bottle that keeps water cold, or some new socks that will help prevent blisters on long walks. 

Whatever your tools are, gather them, and place them in a way that will cue you to do your desired action. If you download that meditation app, put it on the first page of apps on your phone, where you know you’ll see it. If you buy the new water bottle, make sure it’s as functional as you’d like and that you’ll actually carry it around. If you buy the socks, lay them out so you remember to go on your walks. 

Find a support system

Having a support system helps with accountability and makes it easier to persevere when challenges arise. If you’re changing your day-to-day habits and it involves or affects someone else, it’s a great idea to bring that person along for the journey from the get-go – they may even want to join you. 

One recommendation: Be clear with your support system about what support means to you. Do you want them to tell you if they noticed you didn’t do a workout? Or just applaud you when you do? Clarifying these kinds of questions up front will lead to a stronger, more productive support relationship — and probably to more success.

Aim high; start small

Change takes time, and to stick, it needs to be gradual. I often mention an old friend – now a seasoned marathoner – whose first training run was 0.4 mile. Point. Four. Mile! What a beautiful example of perseverance, hard work, and resilience to get to 26.2 miles.

When it comes to changing your healthy habits, start small by modifying one element of your routine at a time, and make that change small – 0.4-mile-small. Crank up the level of change each day or each week and see how you progress.

Track progress, celebrate wins, and embrace learning

Once you’ve started making your change, be sure to measure your progress. Depending on the change(s) you seek in your wellness routine (or rhythm or ritual), you can track them in an app, with pen and paper, in your calendar, or in any number of other ways that work for you. Review your progress regularly.

One of the greatest gifts you can give yourself is to acknowledge and celebrate your wins. Did you try a new vegetarian meal this week? Did you get to bed on time? Did you reach out to an old friend? Acknowledge whatever you did to build your healthy habits, and celebrate. Make note of what empowered you to have this success.

It may not sound like it at first, but another of the best gifts you can give yourself is to reframe failures as learnings. If you fail to do something you set out to do, especially in the early days of changing your routine, it’s tempting to give up, to conclude that this won’t work, and that you just can’t do it.

A powerful reframing tool I offer my clients is to view failures as learning opportunities. It’s like a science experiment – the stimulus didn’t get the desired response, and it’s still helpful to know that. It’s very different to say, “I didn’t get outside for a walk 4 times this week, so I failed,” and to say, “I didn’t get outside for a walk 4 times this week – I learned that the shorter days as fall approaches make it impossible for me to get outside and feel safe walking in the dark. Are there other indoor exercise options we can explore?”

A client recently told me she felt “free to fail” after she stopped viewing failure as, well, failure. It can seem daunting at first, but getting comfortable in the discomfort of failure — of learning — is powerful and productive.

Remember that change takes time

There’s a common belief that habit formation takes 21 days. Unfortunately, that’s been debunked, and the time it takes for our brains to reformulate habits is more like 9-12 weeks.

That means that slow and steady wins the behavior change race. When we change our habits as the foundation of a new routine or rhythm, our brains literally have to change neural connections! It’s a very cool process, but it takes time.

Be patient with yourself as you (and your brain!) change. If things don’t go to plan, write them down, document them, learn from them, and start again the next day.

Embrace what works for you

My final — and most important tip — when it comes to building a personalized wellness routine, is the reminder that what works for someone else may not work for you.

Your system, routine, rhythm, or whatever you want to call it is your unique blend, and as long as it’s not harmful to yourself or others, do what works for you, and say “thank you, but no thank you,” to everyone else who disagrees.

The best routine is one that you can stick to, and it is a-okay if that doesn’t look like your friends’.

Ready to discover your personalized wellness routine?

You don’t have to go about behavior change alone. Learn more about working with me as your coach, and we can partner on a personalized wellness routine, rhythm, or ritual that works for you.

Tips for Healthy Travel

Having previously spent lots of time traveling for work, I know what it’s like to be on the road (or in the air), and many of my coaching clients have a similarly busy lifestyle.

I often hear clients say something to the effect of, “I have a great routine at home… but it all goes out the window when I’m traveling.” It’s understandable — travel is tough on the body and mind, both in ways we notice and some we don’t.

Many of us find ourselves traveling often, whether we’re flying each week for a consulting job, on tour with a performing arts troupe, attending conferences around the world, or just going on vacation. The constant change in our schedule can take a toll on our bodies and minds. Here are some ways you can lessen the impact.

1. Set yourself up for good sleep.

Sleep is powerful for our physical well-being, mental clarity, regulation of moods, and more — and it easily gets wrecked when we travel. From travel anxiety to changing time zones uncomfortable travel arrangements, it can be difficult to stay rested.

Two tools that have made a world of difference for me come at the recommendation of my brother-in-law, who is always jet-setting at a moment’s notice for work.

First is the Trtl Travel Pillow, a goofy contraption that looks like a cross between a scarf and a neck brace. As someone who could not for the life of her sleep on airplanes, I was willing to give anything a try, and the Trtl was a game changer, allowing me to finally get some shut-eye on flights and train rides.

The second tool is an app called Timeshifter, which helps prevent jet lag by allowing your body’s circadian rhythms to adjust before you even leave home. I used it going to and from Asia twice last year, and while I wasn’t completely free of jet lag, I fared better than some of my travel companions, especially on the way there.

While both of these items require a small investment, I think they’re absolutely worth it to increase the chances of waking up refreshed.

2. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate!

Hydration is key regardless, but is especially important if you’re drinking alcohol, traveling by plane, visiting a warm climate, or any combination of the above. Drinking water is essential for regulating many of our body’s processes, and especially for digestion, which can already become disrupted while traveling.

If you’re traveling to an area with clean drinking water, bring your reusable water bottle and refill it as you can. If you’re not sure about the water quality, be sure to take precautions as recommended by the CDC.

3. Pack healthy snacks.

Whether you’re traveling for work in the U.S. or jetting across the world, there’s a high chance you might not have access to the foods you’re used to at home. One thing that stays the same is that hanger can strike anytime, anywhere. Be equally ready for sad boardroom snack trays, long hikes, or unexpected delays by bringing your own snacks. I always pack a box of RXBars in my suitcase.

4. Bring the medications you need (and some you might want). 

As the daughter of two physicians, one of whom was an Eagle Scout, I learned from a young age to be prepared (maybe overly so) for travel. My dad would always pack a small pharmacopeia with him, truly ready for anything. This may be the best habit I’ve carried into adulthood, and I’m not the only one who’s benefited from it. Though I’ve gotten some flak from friends for my gallon-sized Ziploc packed to the brim with every medicine imaginable, those same friends have been known to need a Benadryl, Imodium, Pepto Bismol, Tylenol, Benefiber packet, or some Neosporin and a band-aid at a moment’s notice. Bringing these over-the-counter meds in addition to your prescription medications is especially important when traveling abroad, but it can also save you lots of money from sky-high prices in airport drugstores closer to home.

In addition, always research the countries you’re visiting for any vaccines or medications you might want before you go, and talk to your doctor about whether they’re right for you.

5. Keep a kernel of your home routine.

Whether you’re traveling for work or for fun, it’s likely that your schedule isn’t entirely in your control, which can make your sense of home routine feel distant. Sometimes this is a good thing and can be restorative, but it can also be unsettling and disorienting.

Two of my health coaching clients travel frequently and have found some small ways to bring their home routines with them. One likes to wake up with a spicy drink in the morning, which they find energizes their body. They recently found a way to pack their special pepper from home on a trip to keep this morning ritual alive. Another client recently found pilates as a form of movement that feels accessible to them. In advance of a long trip abroad, we brainstormed some other short, equipment-free workouts they can do in their Airbnb or hotel room to take some time for themselves each day.

6. Be gentle on yourself.

When you’re traveling, life simply isn’t going to look or feel how it does when you’re at home — nor should it. It’s easy to fall into a trap of self-criticism for not fitting in a full workout, for staying out too late with coworkers or friends, or for eating the local fare to excess.

While you might not feel your best if you always let healthy habits disappear while you’re traveling, I believe in a holistic perspective on wellness; in other words, we need to live a little. My grandmother used to say, “You can sleep when you’re dead,” something I’ve kept in mind during a few all-nighters abroad. My other grandmother could eat a quart of ice cream in one sitting, which made me feel a-okay about multiple gelato stops in one day in Spain.

Remember — life’s too short to deprive yourself. Know that things aren’t going to be how they are at home, and embrace that.

7. Make a ‘travel toolkit’ you can keep on your phone.

When traveling, it’s easy to forget the tools you already have at your disposal. One of my clients recently spent a coaching session creating a one-page, virtual ‘travel toolkit’ for an upcoming trip abroad. It includes ideas for nourishment, equipment-free workouts, breathing exercises for stressful moments, and mantras for self-love. I spruced up the design and shared the final file they can keep in their phone’s camera roll or on the home screen as a widget, available to them at any time.

Staying healthy while traveling is one of my topics of interest as a health and wellness coach. If you have other health travel tips, share them in the comments below, or book a discovery session if you’d like to create a personalized goal for wellness while traveling.

5 Sources of Inspiration for Meals at Home

“I eat the same 10 foods all the time.” 

“I’m bored by what I eat.” 

“I need variety.” 

Sound familiar? 

Never fear. There are some simple – and most importantly – fun ways to find inspiration and bring enjoyment back to your eating habits. Here are five ideas. 

1. Go outside.

Taking a walk outside is not only wonderful physical exercise, but is also a way to be open to new ideas. Use your senses to notice your surroundings. If you live in a city, you might smell the cuisine of a local street vendor and get inspired to recreate a dish at home. If you’re closer to nature, the colors of the changing seasons may inspire you, conjuring images of vibrant berries, orange sweet potatoes, red apples, or energizing citrus. I especially love outdoor inspiration for making salads and grain bowls. 

If walking is not accessible to you, you could take a drive if you’re able, or search YouTube and virtually “travel” to different places. There’s no limit to how far you can go!

2. Make your restaurant favorites at home.

If you’re budget- or health-conscious, recreating your restaurant favorites at home is a great way to eat fresh and exciting foods without breaking the bank. To keep track of what inspires you, take pictures of interesting dishes on restaurant menus or make note of foods you ordered and liked.

I recently had an amazing dinner at The Royal here in Washington, D.C., and I couldn’t get enough of their masa gnocchi, made with braised beef, maitake mushroom, queso fresco, herbs, and crispy yucca. It was such a delicious and creative way to combine mushrooms with a small amount of beef, something that our grandmothers knew to be a cost-saving trick to stretch meat further. Here, the beef and mushrooms combined to create a luxurious umami bomb that I can’t wait to attempt to make at home.

The masa gnocchi from The Royal in Washington, D.C.

If salads are more your thing, I’ve been a longtime fan of Sweetgreen. I’ve recently discovered I can create their salads at home for less than a third(!) of what it costs at the restaurant. While this prep does take time, there are shortcuts you can use from prepared chicken (rotisserie or canned) to pre-chopped vegetables. 

3. Get into your comfort zone.

Comfort foods comfort us for a reason – they evoke pleasant memories and traditions. For me, that looks like cabbage and noodles or pasta with butter and cheese, i.e., a lot of very delicious but very tan fare.

Everyone wanted some home-made comfort food.

If your comfort foods are on the richer side and you’d like to lighten them up, you can always find ways to cut down some of the calories or amplify their nutritional value. For example, I often add frozen peas to my cheesy pasta, replace butter with olive oil, or replace cream cheese with its ⅓-less-fat version.

But sometimes, you need the full-fat, true-to-the book recipe, and that is a-okay.

4. Clean out the pantry, freezer, or fridge. 

Stir-fries, frittatas, and fried rice are great vessels for using up random vegetables, proteins, and even cheeses that have been hanging around your kitchen for a little too long. The saddest of vegetables on the brink of wilting can come back to life with the help of heat, seasonings, and a little time.

For guidance on how to cook a basic stir-fry, check out this link from The Recipe Critic. As for fritattas, I’m partial to this fail-proof frittata recipe from Cookie and Kate. I like this fried rice recipe from Gimme Some Oven as a blank canvas.   

5. Return to what you already know — and know where to find it.

If you’re anything like me, there’s a part of you that operates according to the saying, “Out of sight, out of mind.” Though you might be lacking inspiration in this moment, remember that there were probably times you weren’t feeling this way; you might just need to be reminded of them.

To easily find recipes that excite and energize you, I recommend keeping them organized, whether you use a traditional recipe box with paper cards, a notebook, or an app like Paprika or New York Times Cooking. 

There you have it: five ideas for re-energizing and re-inspiring your cooking.

What else else inspires you? Share your ideas with the Amplify Wellness community in the comments below!